sext: you look like the universe decided that it was tired of being so immense so it compressed all of its beauty and complexity and wonder into a smaller form so it could make everyone around it feel like they were a part of the stars
canon jesus is way cooler than fanon jesus
canon jesus was a sassy middle eastern guy who literally said “did i fucking stutter” and hung out with prostitutes
fanon jesus is just some boring white guy who sits around hugging lambs
Just be careful who you say that around. His fandom has literally killed people for disagreeing with their head-canon.
Hotel showers are really weird because they can range anywhere from “gently peeing on you” to “I fear for the safety of my nipples”